


Meant to be

by funtobeher



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Doctor Clarke Griffin, Echo went to Mount Weather and ... you'll see ;-), F/F, Meant To Be, Past Costia/Lexa (The 100), Raven is just being Raven
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:41:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25231036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/funtobeher/pseuds/funtobeher
Summary: It's Lexa and It's Clarke and they meet... nothing new... but no spoilers alert, we'll just see where the story takes me ;-)
Relationships: Clarke Griffin & Lexa, Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Comments: 28
Kudos: 100





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language and I'm not a doctor.

Chapter1

(Lexa’s POV)

As I open my eyes, I realize I’m not home in bed and the beep-beep sound is not my alarm clock. I’m in the hospital, I had surgery. Somebody is calling my name and I turn to my left and look up, blue eyes are looking straight at me, or in me, I’m not sure, it just feels like I’m getting lost in them. It must be the meds, the anesthesia, still making me drowsy, right? I can’t take my eyes from those blue orbits though, can’t see anything else and they feel so familiar, like I have seen them before, like I know when they are sad or happy. Maybe I’m not actually awake yet.

“Lexa, welcome back. Do you feel any pain?”

Blue eyes are still looking at me, interrogatingly.

I’m trying to think, do I feel pain? My head feels light and by body seems made of stone, but no pain.

“No pain”, I say.

“Good, I’m Dr. Griffin I’m the ICU supervisor, your surgery went very well, we will keep you under observation for a few more hours and then you’ll be up to your room. Just relax, in a bit you will feel less confused. I’ll come back to check on you later. “

I nod and she leaves. I’m following her with my eyes, but she is immediately out of my site, there is a white curtain that does not allow me to see much around my bed. She has blonde hair, it’s a bit curly falling on her shoulders. And here is again the feeling that she is familiar, that I know her, like I know how her hair feels around my fingers. But it can’t be, she just told me her name. I close my eyes again, just relax like she said.

I think I fell asleep again, as I must be dreaming, I’m driving on a wide road, seems to be a highway. It’s night and the only lights come from the car’s board, looks like a fancy car, lots of electronics, checking the symbol of the steering wheel, but it is not something I recognize. And then, I notice my arm, it has a strange tattoo on it, a date and a name, Clarke. The date is July 12, 2020. Lights coming from ahead are getting my attention back to the road, and it’s not a road anymore, the car is just floating in the air, a bright light is surrounding it and then it just starts to fall, fast, my heart is racing, I’m going to crash. Board indicators are blinking in red and there is a beep-beep sound like an alarm and I try to brace for impact.

“Dr. Griffin, she’s crashing, BP 180 over 120, heart beat 160”

My eyes shoot open, nurses are all around me and the monitor near by head is beeping like crazy.

“Bring the crash card and give me 50mg of metoprolol”

Dr. Griffin is ready to inject me when the monitor just stops beeping and I feel like all of the sudden I can breathe normally again. She stops on her tracks, checks my pulse, not believing the monitor.

“Lexa, your heart was beating very fast, but it is back to normal again. Do you feel any pain or discomfort? “

I actually feel great, her hand is still on my wrist checking my pulse and it feels so weirdly good, like all I needed is for hear to touch me. I’m confused. Her blue eyes are looking intensely at me and I shake my head to indicate that I feel no pain. Instinctively I look at my arm checking to see if I have any tattoo. Of course not, it was a dream.

“I think I just head a nightmare”, I say, “I was in a car and I was about to crash.”

She is now listening at my heart with her stethoscope.

“All seems to be good, it is not unusual to have nightmares after anesthesia, it is not that common though that they almost make your heart go into fibrillation”, she says. “I will allow them to get you back to your room, but you should remain in observation for the night. “

She writes something down on my chart and is about to leave. I can’t let her leave, I don’t understand why, I just know I want her to stay a bit longer.

“Dr. Griffin…”, I call as she is turning to leave…

“Yes…”

“Today, is 12 of July, right?”

“Yes, it is… Lexa, do you feel disoriented? Why are you asking what date it is?”

“No, doc, all fine, just wanted to make sure.”

“Ok, Lexa. Somebody will come now to take you back to your room. Have a speedy recovery!”

She makes to leave again.

“Dr. Griffin…” I call again, “what is your first name?”

She looks at me with some sort of twinkle in hear eyes, the way you would look at a naughty child.

“Why do you want to know, Lexa?”

“Well… “ , I smile and wink at her “ … for starters, you know my name…”

My voice sounded flirty… what am I doing? That’s not right, I’m not supposed to flirt with her… what’s going on with me. Somehow, I can’t help it. She looks at me and her eyes are telling me I’m starting to cross a line I’m not supposed to, but she says nothing, just stays there and looks at me, so I continue.

“And second, because of my dream, it was strange and it was something about 12th of July and somebody called Clarke.”

Now she looks at me with wide eyes and I can see she starts to be worried, her expression changes, its like she shuts down defensively and I’m really sorry to have upset her, even if I don’t understand how my question and mentioning that name can have that effect on her. I want to take it back.

“Forget it doc, I can see my question upset you, it was not my intention, just don’t worry about it.”

She sakes her head and I can see she is trying to school her face into not showing what she is thinking. She smiles, but its just a fake smile, her eyes are still worried.

“It’s ok Lexa, no worries, my name is Clarke and probably you have seen it on my name tag, that would explain your dream. You said you were in a car accident, was I also there? Or this Clarke person in your dream”

Now I’m starting to shake my head...

“No, no… there was nobody else in my dream, I was alone in a car, the name and the date were tattooed on my arm. Like you said, I must have seen it on your name tag …. it makes sense. “

She nods, and it seems like she would like to say something else, but the nurse arrives to take me away and she just says good bye and goes away.

I can’t help wondering why her reaction, I know patients don’t go around asking their doctors for their first names, but there is no harm in that, is it? And would be no reason for her to almost look scared. What did she think, that I’m some sort of a stoker? Maybe she had some bad experience in the past?

One thing is sure, something told me that is was better if I did not mention that her name tag only said C. Griffin, MD


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not much Clexa, but we get a bit of background on Clarke and understand why she reacted the way she did. This chapter is Clarke's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was not expecting people to actually read this story, it's cool to see you guys do. I hope you enjoy it, I'm definitely having fun writing it.

Chapter 2

(Clarke’s POV)

[3 days ago – Clarke’s apartment]

“Clarkey… come on, don’t be a petulant child… you have to come tomorrow night!”, says Raven pouting at me like I just took away her favorite toy. “You need a drink, some fun… when was the last time you were out?”

I start to say that I’m out all the time, I go to work, visit my mum, do groceries… but before I even manage to open my mouth Raven continues…

”out like in having fun, out… not out of the house for work or other boring stuff”, she smirks, because she knows she got me again. She does that all the time, knows what I will say, before I say it… damn genius!

Truth to be told we know each other since we were kids, no wonder she knows what I’m thinking. Not that she is not also a genius, that she is, by the time I finished high school, she was starting her grad school and now she is some big shoot engineer. Not that I understand what exactly she is doing. You know when people use ‘rocket science’ to define something very complex…. well… Raven is rocket science … I mean literally, she does work with rockets. I can’t help but smile, as I look at her, she is splashed on my couch, one leg bouncing over the head rest, literally torturing my remote control for not changing the channels fast enough, still pouting because I did not give in yet. That’s not how a rocket scientist looks like, right? And she calls, me, a petulant child!

I must have zoom out a bit there, as she abandoned the couch and come to sit on the floor in front of my chair, her head on my knees, like a puppy and of course, she gives me her best puppy eyes… and again I’m the petulant child… nope…

“Everybody will be there, like old times, Octavia is bringing that new guy she is dating, Lincoln…”

“Ray, I have an early shift in the morning, I’m tired…”

“Nope, you are not tired, what you are is no fun… that’s it… no wonder…” she stops, and suddenly looks guilty… “never mind… “she adds…” just come, please… pretty please, please!!!”… and just like that puppy eyes are back looking straight at me.

“No wonder what, Ray?”, I don’t want to leave her off the hook, I know what she was about to say, I know what they all think sometimes… Finn, he cheated on me and all my friends think that I had my part of the blame there, that I concentrate too much on my work and not enough on anything else. They are not wrong, I mean I’m not saying they are right, cheating is never justified, but in a way, I could have paid more attention to my relationship, put a bit more heart into it, even if I don’t think a good relationship should require that much work, it should come more naturally, no?

“Clarke, you know I love you, right? … but this thing with Finn was just fucked up as you just let it happen. You were not with Finn, for Finn… if you know what I mean… you should have broken up with him long time ago, you were with him just because it was part of your routine… work, sleep, eat, be with Finn…. exactly in that order”.

Her look is serious now, I know it’s hard for her, Finn was… still is, her friend, almost family, and even if she will never defend him for cheating, I know she thinks I should have ended it long before. I was not happy, Finn was not happy, but we were Clarke and Finn and it was not that simple to just be Clarke and just be Finn. In a way we both new that we were just clinging to each other and we also knew, Finn would have never ended it on his own, he was even more stuck on the idea of Clarke & Finn than I was, so it had to be me. And it had crossed my mind in various occasions, just look him in the eye and say he is free, free to be without me… but I never did, as hiding behind the façade of us, as a couple, was easier than facing the reality of being on my own.

I smile at her, as to say we are ok, none of this will hurt our friendship and she takes it and smiles back and then just like that her face is not serious anymore and she pouting again.

“Say you are coming, Clarkey….”

“Who else will be there?”

“Well…, like I said, Octavia and her new guy… and Monty, Jasper, maybe John….” and she hesitates a bit before adding “… and Bellamy and Echo”

Mmm…. Echo… I know why she hesitated, the girl is freaking us out lately. Ever since her and Bellamy went to that spiritual retreat on Mount Weather, she is strange, things she says are just weird and even more weird, she is like a clairvoyant or something, she doesn’t always make sense, but somehow the things she says tend to become true.

“What did she say this time, Ray?”

“She said something important in my life will break…. and damn, a few day ago my favorite tooth brush stopped working… changed batteries and everything and nothing… it just wont work anymore… she just jinxed it”

“Raven, be serious, she can’t jinx things…”

“Nope, she did….” And she stood up and went back to sit on the couch. “phew… still better than last time” she added.

I have to give it to her, one day Echo told Raven that she thinks she will have a long vacation soon, a few days after, Raven fell down her bike and broke a leg… she did stay home from work a long time to recover…well… not exactly the vacation one is hoping for. But this is how Echo’s prediction work, things she says make sense, but never exactly as she says them. Before I caught Finn in bed with another girl, she told me she dreamt of Finn in bed covered up with a bed sheet …. well… when I entered the bedroom that day, he did try to hide himself and the girl under the sheets…. not exactly like in Echo’s prediction, but close enough, right?

One though is suddenly crossing my mind.

“Raven, do you want me to come tomorrow evening, just because you hope Echo will concentrate on my and leave you alone?”

She looks like I just caught her in flagrant délit, but than she starts laughing.

“You know how it is…” she says and winks …” the more the merrier… and Echo might also spread a bit around her wisdom…. Less for me, that is…”

She looks at her watch and stands up to leave.

“Lunch break over, time to head back to work…. So, did I convince you to come and rescue me from jinxy Echo?”

“Fine, Ray, I’ll come… I miss the guys, it would be fun…. as for Echo…. What else can she say, not sure she can beat her Finn prediction” and I mentally knock on wood, just in case, even if hell… one should not believe in these things.

[2 days ago – Grounders Pub&More]

The gang was all there and the mood was light, everybody was having fun. Octavia’s new guy Lincoln turn out to be a tall, dark, handsome teddy bear and I have never seen Octavia that happy.

Never tell this to Raven, but I was happy she made me come. I really needed some time with my friends, breaking up with Finn was month ago and it was time for me to get out of my bat cave.

It was just an evening of light banter, even when they all insisted that I needed to be fixed up with someone else, you know, some good, healthy, rebound story.

Till Echo, turns to me and says….

“Guys… no need to fix Clarkey up…. She is good on her own…. Somebody with green eyes, will crash their car because of her… or with her, not very clear and that’s when Clarke gets hooked for life…” …. and then she adds …” oh… and they end up in the hospital…. Mmm…. Might not be that fun as I thought”

Everyone is silent for a second and then they all start laughing and commenting in the same time.

“Come on Echo…that was some plain shit, soul mate story, right there… just cut out the hospital part, will you?”, Octavia says and winks at me… “you hear that Griffin, you are hooked for life….” and they all start laughing again.

“This green eye person, is he handsome?” asks Raven

“mmm… I don’t know I did not see a face, just green eyes and there is a tattoo on their arm… I think Clarke’s name or something like that…. You know what, it might actually be a girl”

And with that Echo concludes her new prediction and all the gang totally loves it, it’s a chaos of comments and laughter, all for my benefit. They even started chanting.

“Griff has a girlfriend, Griff has a girlfriend….”

If you ask me, they are worse then middle schoolers. Not to mentioned I’m not particularly thrilled about it, Echo’s past predictions turn out to be quite a pickle.

[Present day – hospital]

She opens her eyes and green forest is looking right back at me. I think I’m staring… can’t really help it, those eyes are fascinating… damn, get yourself together Griffin, you are her doctor and she just woke up from her anesthesia, don’t be a creeper, just say something for god sake! Here goes nothing.

“Lexa, welcome back. Do you feel any pain?”

“No pain” she says… and that’s it, I’m hooked…what, wait a moment, hooked?... no way that is the word Echo used…damn Echo, what are you doing to me???

I leave her get back to sleep and went on with my day, ICU is full today lots of surgeries on the schedule. Having one more look at her chart before I put it back on it’s place, Lexa Woods, 29, in for an appendectomy. That’s funny, kids get appendectomies, if she has a friend like Raven, she’s going to be the object of puns for a while now. At least is nothing serious … and while thinking that I feel better, like relieved or something and I know I’m blushing cause my cheeks feel really warm… oh, boy….

I don’t have much time to duel on my new and totally crazy feelings for an absolute stranger, very attractive stranger, but nevertheless still just a stranger, when the nurse is calling a code red, bed 5. That’s Lexa’s bed, wtf?

I’m rushing over and just when I’m about to stick the needle in her arm with medication to calm her heart down, she wakes up and just like that the monitor stops beeping and her heart rate is back to normal. I take her wrist to check her pulse and it’s like an electric shock went up my arm and it feels so weird how my fingers seem to just belong there. I’m getting lost in my head again, give it a rest Griffin, you need to focus here.

She says something about a nightmare and a car crashing and I notice she’s looking at her arm, like searching for something and maybe, just maybe, there is a split second when her face shows relief for not finding anything there. Echo’s words come back to me… the tattoo… there is no way she is searching for a tattoo, is she?

She asks for my name, there is nothing wrong with that, even if she is definitely flirty and I’m her doctor and with anyone else, I might have tried to set them straight, but not with her, her being flirty makes me all giddy inside and I have to just try to keep a huge grin from creeping on my face. What are you doing Griffin, she is your patient… just stop it, be professional. 

She says her dream was about me… well, somebody called Clarke, as she did not see who it was. My head is just spinning, everything that Echo said is getting back to me…. Green eyes, checked, hospital checked, something about a car crash….in a dream, but checked… and potentially even a tattoo. Not to mention that I have this strange feeling like I knew her all my life ever since she opened her eyes and first looked at me.

I’m starting to panic a bit, and my face must reflect some of the battle in my mind as she seems sorry that she asked me for my name and I want to say that I’m not upset, just don’t know how to.

I mumble something about my name being on my name tag and she looks straight at it and agrees with me even if my name is not on the damn tag at all and she just looks at me like her question broke me and she wants to take it all back. What a mess. I have to get out of here. The nurse comes to take her back to her room and I take advantage of that and quickly say good bye, turn on my heels and leave.

By now she probably thinks I must be a weirdo.

I call Raven, she picks up on the 3rd ring.

“Griff, what’s up?”

I just blurt out…

“I met her Raven, green eyes, car crash … exactly like Echo said…. And I think I fucked it up big time” 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I really thought they will get to talk this chapter, but then Lexa needed some background story too and Clarke...well, she just needed to dig herself a much larger hole. Sorry about that, basically, still nothing gets done in this chapter to bring the two closer. I guess I'm just procrastinating.

Chapter 3

(Lexa’s POV)

The nurse took me back to my room and now I’m just waiting for Dr. Jackson to pass by, maybe I can convince him to let me go even if Clarke… I mean Dr. Griffin, said I should stay over night just to be sure. I’m quite sure my heart is fine, nothing clinical there, it was definitely the dream, or better, not the dream itself, it was Clarke and whatever connection I have with her. I can’t stop thinking about her, it’s a feeling I did not have in a long time, not since Costia anyway.

I have met Costia during my undergrad at Columbia, I was a nerd convinced that one day I will fix world’s biggest problems and she was like spring, light, blooming and surprising in every way. Needless to say, I loved her madly and she loved me back, I thought it would be forever. It wasn’t. Eventually, the same way, spring turns to autumn, Costia faded away, a bit more every day, consumed by un unforgivable disease. World’s problems were forgotten, I graduated top of my class and got a job with a big law firm, mergers and acquisitions, not by far my dream, but it paid well and Costia’s treatments were not exactly cheap. She died on rainy November day and I kept on living. If moving through life like a shadow can be considered living. Like a cliché from a tragic romantic story, she made me promise I would live my life at its fullest, that I will love again and be happy. I tried to keep my promise, and eventually I got better, I’ve mended my broken heart as much as I could and went on, one day at the time. I swear, though, if I ever hear Guns N’ Roses – November rain, I still sob like a child and all the progress I made vanishes in an instant.

Here I am, still a lawyer specialized in merges and acquisitions, guess it stuck with me after all, rushed to the ER in the middle of a negotiation for an acute pain in the abdomen that turn out to be an appendicitis. My client was not doing that good during said negotiation, I’m sure the other party thought my crisis was just an excuse to buy us some time… we are lawyers after all, nothing is impossible when it comes to make our client win. Not that it matters anyway, I hated that client, and that job in general. Maybe I should just quit, do something more meaningful, or why not, maybe even solve world’s problems as I was once set to do. The only reason I did not quit yet, was that I felt so tired, putting back broken pieces of my life, left me drained of energy for anything else.

Not today though, today I was feeling full of hope, energized and willing to get back on that metaphoric horse and ride it again. Yup… no doubt about it, waking up looking into Clarke’s blue eyes was the best thing that happened to me in a long time. All I needed to do now, was find a way to keep Clarke into my life, easier said than done, judging by her reaction. Still, I’m nothing but stubborn and strong believer in the philosophy of ‘if there is a will, there is a way’. And believe me, the will is definitely there.

(Clarke’s POV)

“I met her Raven, green eyes, car crash … exactly like Echo said…. And I think I fucked it up big time”

“Clarke, slow down, what are you talking about?”

“The girl, Raven… the girl from Echo’s story… my girl… she is here in the hospital and I let her go without…”

“Your girl? … Damn, you are moving fast Griffin”

“Not joking here Ray, I really need to fix this…us, I need us to be an ‘us’…”

“Clarke, you are not making much sense here… ‘us’ who?

“Lexa and I”

“Lexa… oh, yes, now it makes a lot more sense… Clarke, are you sure you did not hit your head or something? I did not hear you so riled up since 3rd grade when you tried to convince the entire class that only couples can eat Twix, single people had to eat Mars”

“Ray, you are not helping….”

I was pacing on the hallway while talking with Raven and there he was, Dr. Jackson, Lexa’s surgeon. I hit the end button on my conversation with Raven with the speed of light and rushed to chase Dr. Jackson down the hallway. If I could see myself, I would probably conclude that I was acting like a crazy person.

“Dr. Jackson” I just yell after him

He turns around and stops to wait for me. I was running, so he must have thought there was some sort of emergency.

“Dr. Griffin, what is the problem?” he said, and was looking at me expectantly.

Indeed… what is the problem? Now that I was face to face with him, kinda short of breath after my race, I really did not know what to say. I mean, all I could think about was that I had a crash on Lexa Woods, his patient, and …. What? I did not actually know what I wanted, nothing he could do anyhow. It was just ridiculous that I had even chased after him in the first place. And then I here myself saying…

“Your patient, Lexa Woods, you need to keep her over night for observation, she had an episode of tachycardia, could be dangerous”

He looked at me with a puzzled expression, there was no point for me to run after him, just to say that, it was already noted in her chart, chart that he must have seen already.

“Yes, Dr. Griffin, I have noticed you mentioned that in her chart”

Yup, as I thought he’s already seen that, I was making myself ridiculous, just add to the mess, Griffin, way to go.

I nod my head and he continues.

“You also mentioned there was no need for medication, heart rate went back to normal on his own. Is there anything else that you think can represent a risk? Something you forgot to mention in the chart, perhaps?”

Here we go, of course, he would think I would have been negligent with my notes, why else I would have chased after him. Careful Griffin, stop acting stupid, you’ll end up being called by the hospital board for a chat and you don’t want that, do you? Your mother is on the board for god sake, what will you tell her…. ‘Hey mum, you know, I just lost it because of a pretty face’…no… correction, drop dead gorgeous face … still, that will not end well at all. Make it right, Griffin, make it right, damn it!

“No, nothing else Dr. Jackson. It’s all in the notes. I just saw you passing by and I thought I should tell you in person, you know, notes can be so sterile sometime”

Good save there, Griffin, now just politely say good bye and walk away, he is still looking at you not really convinced you are telling the truth.

“Oh… ok, Dr. Griffin, if that is all, then please excuse me, I was just on my way to sign Miss Woods off, I see no reason why we would keep her here any longer, it was after all, a very simple procedure”

“Yes, sure, indeed. Good day Dr. Jackson, I will not keep you any longer” I say while struggling to keep calm. He is letting her go, you idiot, you have to go talk to her before or you’ll miss your chance.

I can’t just go see her now, he is on his way there too, will have to wait, but she might leave… what should I do?

As I was walking in the opposite direction Dr. Jackson went, thinking of a way I could approach Lexa, my pager went off, 911 emergency, patient crashing in the ICU. That’s it, by the time I will deal with this, Lexa will have left the hospital. I guess it’s the universe telling me that it was not meant to be.

‘Not meant to be’… now, that thought, did not sit well with me, I may not be able to fix it now, but damn straight (or not so straight at all) I will fix it later, the universe can go … take a walk!

And, so, in a perfect Scarlett O’Hara’s tomorrow is another day imitation, Clarke goes back to work.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not there yet, don't hate me... it's just that once they do get together it will be the end of the story.

Chapter 4

(Lexa’s POV)

Dr. Jackson told me I can go home, all is well, so now I’m just waiting for my sister Anya to come pick me up. As on cue, Anya enters my room, carrying a bunch of balloons. Wait a moment, what? Balloons?

“Hey, little sis, how are you feeling?”, she says, “these are for you” and she point to the balloons she is carrying.

“Anya, what did you do? What’s with the balloons, I’m not 5 anymore”

“Well, now little sis… are you sure about that? Here you are with burst appendices like a 5-year-old, ergo, the balloons seem very much appropriate”

Of course, she would make fun of me. I put up my best indignation face and say “You know adults can be subject to appendectomies too, it is not even that uncommon”.

“Sure, they do”, she says smirking, “do you want your lollypop now or when we get home?”

“Now, please!” I say and we both start laughing, of course there is no lollypop, she is just teasing. Too bad though, I would actually love a lollypop now.

“Stop making me laugh, Anya, my stomach hurts when I laugh, apparently is a thing, any kind of abdominal surgery and you are benched for laughing for a while” , I say while trying to get my shoes on, which seems to be quite a difficult task also, so I add …”what do you know, I’m benched from bending too… a little help here, sis?”

She does help with the shoes and with my jacket, three little holes, that’s all this surgery is and even so my whole body seem to be rigid and aching. Anya looks at me with a thinking expression on her face.

“Hey”, she says, “I think is better if you would actually come back home with me… you know, for a few days, you look like a rusty robot that needs a lot of help”

“I’m fine Anya, doc said I will be a lot better tomorrow, maybe just my shoulder will hurt a bit”

She looks at me with an amused face.

“I always knew there was something wrong with you… kept telling mum, you were special….and look, I’m right, your appendix was on your shoulder… why can’t you be more like normal people?”

That’s Anya for you, always mocking or teasing and always with a serious face, like she really means all she says. She can be quite scary if you don’t know her.

“That’s silly even for you, Ann… appendix on my shoulder…. What am I Frankenstein?”

I did my best not to laugh, let Anya do that for both of us, at least for now.

As she was helping me get into the car, I could feel her eyes studying me, like she was trying to understand something. She sat in the driver seat, put on her seatbelt and then finally turned towards me and said…

“There is something going on with you, something is different… can’t really put my finger on... I know I’ve seen you like this before, but just… maybe long time ago?”

I knew what she was talking about, I had the same feeling, I was feeling like me, a younger me, before losing Costia, before being broken. I guess I was not coping anymore, I had finally moved on. And without thinking too much, the words just came up of my mouth…

“I met someone today, Ann… she is … I don’t know … there was this void and she just fits in perfectly and the void is not there anymore… “

Anya had started the car and we were about to get out of the parking, when she hits the breaks, the car stops hard and she turns and looks at me like I was a ghost or something.

“You did, what….???”

(Clarke’s POV)

After the first emergency, there were others and I just could not get out of the ICU for the rest of my shift. I did go up on the ward after that, looking for Lexa, but she was long gone. So, I did the only thing left to do, got her contact details from her chart. Not that I’m going to just go knocking on her door, that would be just too weird, but I could call, or send her a text. Maybe a text, if she does not want to talk to me, at least I don’t get to hear rejection in her voice.

For now, though all I wanted to do was go home and sleep, my shift was 16 hours straight and I was exhausted. Not to mention that a good night sleep, before rushing into texting Lexa, might not be such a bad idea.

On the way to my car, I decided to check my phone for messages, see if maybe Raven had call back after I hanged up on her earlier. No missed phone calls or messages from Raven. That was a bit odd. A message from my mom, asking to have brunch on Sunday and 61 messages in our friends chat group. Ok, a bit more than usual, but not that much, these guys were known for starting stupid, endless conversations, so I just thought I will read them later, but just scrolling over them my name caught my eyes a few times, so I started reading from the top.

RayRay: Yo ppl, hear from Griff today?

Bell: not since Grounders the other night.

Monty: ditto

O: whazzup, Ray?

Jasper: she must be at work, no?

Murphy: did you lose her?

Echo: no contact here

Harper: why?

RayRay: she hanged up on me earlier…

O: what'cha did this time Ray?

RayRay: me… I’m an angel :-P

Monty: so, why’d she hang up on u, then?

Bell: Ray, if you are an angel , I’m Prince Charming

Jasper: who’s Cinderella?

Harper: something wrong with Clarke?

Murphy: Yo, Clarke… are you there?

Echo: what were you talking about when she hanged up on you?

RayRay: that’s the thing, she was not making much sense

RayRay: went on about some girl she met

Bell: what girl?

O: she was supposed to meet that green eye girl, no, Echo?

Echo: that’s what I saw…

Monty: you don’t really believe that, do you?

Echo: hey, I see what I see…

O: what was she saying, Ray?

RayRay: not much…she was just mumbling mostly

RayRay: but she did say ‘my girl’ and ‘us’

RayRay: maybe not in the same sentence….

Bell: ‘my girl’?...that’s not like Clarke

Monty: true that, she did not even call Naylah ‘my girl’ and they were together for a while

RayRay: exactly, right?… is just weird

O: Echo said she will be hooked… 😉

Echo: what else?

RayRay: she kept saying something about fixing things

Bell: what things?

RayRay: she never said, but she did say a name…

Harper: and you could not lead with that?

Monty: Clarke… say something!

Ball: come on… don’t keep us waiting… what was the name?

RayRay: Lexa

RayRay: she kept saying ‘us’, so I’ve asked who’s ‘us’

RayRay: she said, and I quote: Lexa and I

Harper: so, basically Clexa…

Bell: what?

RayRay: I like it, Clexa … it’s catchy

Bell: back up a bit, so this girl, Lexa, is Clark’s girlfriend?... since when?

Bell: where is Clarke anyhow?

O: wait… I know a Lexa

RayRay: you do? Who is she?

O: Lincoln sister’s name is Lexa…

Harper: what? Your boyfriend Lincoln sister is Clarke’s girlfriend? …. Are you in-laws, now?

RayRay: wouldn’t that be something?

Monty: hold your horses, guys, we don’t even know it’s the same Lexa…

Echo: what’s Lincoln’s last name?

O: Woods

Echo: it’s the same Lexa

Harper: how do you know?

Echo: Trees… there were lost of trees in my dream

RayRay: and the oracle spoke….

O: Clarke, read your damn messages!

RayRay: yes, Clarke… don’t propose without telling us!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

(Clexa POV)

“Lexa, will you marry me?”

Clarke did not plan this, but here she was, standing in front of Lexa, holding her breath for an answer. She had no ring, nor did she prepare a speech and sure as hell Lexa did not expected it. But there was something about this moment when they both stood at the edge of a cliff, facing the valley below them, no human life in site, alone at the edge of the world.

As Clarke stood there, holding Lexa’s hand, surrounded by nothing by silence, she felt overwhelmed with what Lexa meant to her, with the unstoppable force pulling them together, destiny, some might call it. Her life had no meaning without her, every breath she took, matched Lexa’s breath, their hearts beat in sync with one another. As their fingers were intertwined, so were their lives, Clarke was the one for Lexa and Lexa was the one for Clarke.

And so, blue eyes looked into green eyes and the words just poured out of Clarke’s mouth, all in one breath.

“Lexa, will you marry me?”

Lexa squeezed Clarke’s hand, pulled her closer, leaned in and brought their lips together. A soft kiss, slowly moving her lisp over Clarke’s, more like breathing together, two bodies, on soul. Lexa’s lips were still ghosting over Clarke’s when she said

“Yes, I’ll marry you Clarke, now and forever, never apart”

Closer together, hand in hand, they both looked at the valley below them, gazing over the ruins of the city they once loved. No human life in site, no building left standing.

It was the end of the world and they were facing it together.

Clarke woke up with a scream.

Lexa woke up drenched in cold sweat.

Both looked at their hands as if they could still feel the touch of the other’s hand.

(Lexa’s POV)

I had convinced Anya to drive us home before I tell her anything else, but once there, I could not longer avoid the topic. I was not sure exactly what to say, it was not that easy to describe what I felt. As crazy as it sounded, Clarke, the girl I’ve only met a few hours ago seemed forever part of my life.

There was no doubt in my mind that my connection with Clarke was there all along, and even if I did not know anything about this Clarke, I must have been very close with some other version of Clarke, in another life time or another universe.

On the other hand, trying to explain that to Anya, was totally absurd and she would have been convinced I went nuts or something. You see, the problem is that I never believed in past lives or alternative universes and that was an opinion my sister Anya knew too well. So, I couldn’t just tell her what I really felt, I had to go with something more realistic.

I could see she was losing her patience, waiting for me to tell her the story about this person I had met.

“So…” I start to say… “I was thinking to go back to the hospital in a day or two and go see her”

“That’s a good plan Lexa, but you still did not tell me, who is this girl” said Anya and she was definitely losing her patience now.

“She is the doctor in the ICU. I woke up and she was looking at me. Most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen, and she was nice too. I mean, I know it was just out of anesthesia and all, but… I don’t know, she just felt right”

Well… that was not totally a lie, was it? But it did not satisfy Anya.

“Let me get this right…” she says…” that’s it, she is just a doctor, with nice blue eyes? I’m not buying it, Lexa, I mean, when you said you met someone, she seemed to be a bit more than a nice face. You’ve met many good-looking girls before, blue eyes and all, what’s so special about this one?

That was actually a good question, it was exactly what I could not explain.

“I don’t know how to explain it Ann, it’s just this feeling I have that she is special”

“I must say I’m a bit disappointed” she said. “I was expecting a bit more. Anyhow, probably is best if you get to bed, get some rest and if tomorrow morning she is still so special, you can do something about it. Don’t get me wrong Lexa, I would be so happy if you would start dating somebody… it’s long overdue and we both know it… but just don’t rush into anything.”

“You are right, I’m feeling very tired, going to sleep sounds like a good idea…. Btw, how come Lincoln did not show up at the hospital?

“He had to work, but he said he will pass by tomorrow. He also said that as soon as you feel up to it, he wants us to go have dinner with his new girlfriend”

“Octavia, right? … sure sounds like a great idea. I’m off to bed, see you in the morning… and Ann, thanks for letting me stay with you tonight”

“No need to thank me, if I’m not taking care of my sister, who will?” says Anya and I know she is right. She always took care of me.

I wave good bye and go to the guestroom where Anya had prepared the bed for me. I think I must have fall asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. Don’t know for how long I was sleeping, when I woke up, almost jumping out of the bad. I was dreaming, but it seemed so real. My hand was warm, like I had held somebody’s else hand for a long time and my lips were still tingling as from a kiss. And I could remember every detail, looked like this was more than a dream, it almost felt like I have lived that moment for real. I’m even more convinced now that I have to go back to the hospital and talk to Clarke, as crazy as it might sound when I will tell her.

(Clarke’s POV)

Clarke: haha…very funny you guys!

Clarke: I just finished my shift, on my way home 

Clarke: no worries, I’m still single :-P

Clarke: I don’t know if she is Lincoln’s sister, but her name is for sure Woods… small world, right?

I did not waited to see if anyone will say anything, pocketed my phone and just drove myself home. Went straight to bad and fall asleep right away.

And then… wow, I woke up… actually I think it was me screaming that woke me up… what a strange dream… I was married with Lexa…and it felt so real… and it felt so good … and it was the fucking apocalypse!!!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost there ;-)  
> A couple of chapters more and it's a wrap.

Chapter 6

(Lexa’s POV)

It’s been a week almost since my surgery, I’m almost not bothered by it anymore. I’ve left Anya’s house and went back to my own apartment. I was convinced sleeping in my own bed will make me sleep better, but it did not happen, the dreams that started my first night back home continued ever since. Every morning I would wake up and have the feeling it was not a dream, I was actually living or lived through all those things from my dreams. They were never the same, not even remotely, different time periods, different places, even different languages.

In one of them I was about nine years old, first day of a new school year. My mum took me to school and I remember being scared and not wanting to go. It’s rather interesting as in real life, or this life, my mum died when I was really young, I don’t even remember her, but in my dream, she was so real and all seemed just so normal. Myself from the dream was quite similar with my own child version, I was a shy kid and got bullied a lot in school. The dream me was pretty much the same and from the dread I was feeling when mum left me at school entrance, I can bet, I was bullied in the dream too. As I was walking to my class, some kids bumped into me and pushed me to the floor. They were laughing at me and one of them took my backpack and just emptied all its contents on the floor and the others were just kicking my stuff all over the place. I was holing back my tears, I’m quite sure I did not cry, at least not in the dream, but when I woke up tears were rolling down my cheeks. Yes, Clarke was part of this dream too, or at least what I know as Clarke in this dream version. She was maybe a year or two older then I was, big blue eyes, short blonde hair, showed up just when the bullies go tired of messing with my stuff and were ready to start kicking me around. She had a few friends with her and they managed to stop what was happening. I started to get my things together and she sat down on the floor in front of me and helped me stuff everything back into my backpack. She never said a word, but when we were done, she took my hand, helped me up and walked with me to my class, never leaving my hand. I woke up knowing that was the beginning of something we shared for many years to come.

Another time I was about twenty, or a bit younger than that, can’t really place the period, but judging by my clothes most probably at least a couple of centuries back. There was some kind of party, or more appropriate a ball. I have danced and flirted al evening with several young men, which is rather odd, since I’m 100% gay and flirting with boys was never on the list of things I would have done, but there I was, doing it and nothing seemed strange about it in the dream.

How did Clarke fit into this dream…well… one of the young men dancing with me, had blue eyes, blond hair, quite feminine features and very delicate hands. He called me princess and hold my hand tight while we danced. We had a walk in the gardens and he kissed me under the moonlight, holding me close to him. And I know he was actually a girl, and even if no names come up, she was definitely Clarke and that was my first kiss.

Another time I was a warrior and Clarke was at my side, like my right hand, a general or something. We fought battles together and ruled a kingdom of some sort. People would call me Heda or commander and they would call Clarke, skyprisa or Wanheda.

There was also a dream where I was old and peacefully died in my bed, with my wife Clarke holding my hand, surrounded by our family, children and grandchildren. From this dream I woke up rested and knowing I has a long and good life and build an entire family with Clarke at my side.

The dreams were all like this, Clarke was always there and every time it just felt like it was meant to be. Every version of me, was drawn to every version of Clarke and vice versa.

And so, more and more convinced that staying away from Clarke was pointless, I got out of my apartment, stopped at the flower shop to get some flowers and headed towards the hospital. It was about time to talk to her and the flowers could not hurt, worst case scenario I could always say my visit was just to say thank you to my doctor.

(Clarke’s POV)

I keep dreaming about Lexa or better yet, with Lexa, as every dream seems so real, is not like I’m just seeing a story, I’m in the story, actively participating to everything. I had several dreams by now, and each time is like living another life, so different from each other. Not all easy or happy, but all with Lexa by my side. It’s so strange, I don’t know this girl, but if feels like I actually know her better than I know myself.

Eventually my friends gave up asking about her, Raven asked a bit more, I even told her about a couple of my dreams, she said it was spooky, stranger that all the other things Echo has ever told us about in the past. But after a few days, even Raven gave up, since nothing was really happening. I did not tell her I had Lexa’s number and was tempted to call her a few times. Never did though, I did not know what exactly I should tell her. It’s not like you can call a total stranger and just say

“Hey, I think you are my soulmate, wanna hang out?”

That would be way to strange, right? Especially since the entire concept of soulmates was something I did not really believe in. Sounded a bit too much like a Hollywood movie and I still couldn’t quite wrap my head around it.

So, I did not call. A part of me was hoping that she would be indeed Lincoln’s sister and therefore we would meet again. Octavia said Lincoln was planning to have a party so their friends could all meet. It would be easier to talk to her in person, at least that’s how I thought.

After all these dreams, it would be totally uncool if the universe would not put us face to face again, right? At last this is what I kept telling to myself. Maybe I was just being a coward.

Anyway, here I was, going about my day, a few more hours left from my shift when I get paged to the nurse’s station. Sometimes my mum would do that so we could grab a coffee or a bite to eat in the cafeteria together. Nothing odd there. So, after finishing a check on a new post-op arrival in the ICU I’m heading towards the nurse’s station. Once there, I look around for my mum, but I don’t see her, nor do I see anyone else that I know, so I go to the counter to ask why was I paged.

“Hey, Gina, I got a page to come here, do you know why?”

“Oh, hi Dr. Griffin, a girl was asking for you, she is just over there near the vending machine… she has a bouquet of flowers, maybe a patient of yours?” Gina says and points towards a girl standing with her back to me looking out of the window.

I started walking towards the girl waiting there, she was wearing a pair of dark jeans, black boots and a leather jacket. I could see she was holding flowers in one hand. She did seem familiar, so I thought Gina was probably right, it happened sometimes that patience or patience family would come by to say thank you. Again, did not give it much thought.

And then, the girl turned towards me and I stopped dead in my tracks.

“Lexa?”


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

(Lexa’s POV)

Turns out getting flowers for Clarke was not as simple as I thought. All I wanted was a simple, normal bouquet and I was totally unprepared when the florist asked me what the flowers were for. What did I want the flowers to say? I did not have a clue what I wanted to say to Clarke, let alone what message the flowers should convey. Did I wanted to say tank you to my doctor?… Sure, yeh… but that was not exactly it. Did I wanted to tell Clarke that I liked her?...Most definitely, just maybe not so out of the blue. Not to mention, I did not want something that will imply that we should be friends. Not that I did not want her to be my friend too, but I did not want her to be just that. Total conundrum. In the end the florist put together a colorful mix made of some flowers with names I’ve never knew before, something with a neutral meaning, something that could go with any meaning. It should do for now.

So, here I am, standing in the hospital, waiting for Clarke to respond to the page one of the nurses sent her. They did not ask me why was I looking for her, I think they’ve seen the flowers and assumed I was a patient saying thank you. Good enough for me, I just went with it. I did not know what to do with myself while waiting for her, kept gazing out the window trying to set some order into my thoughts. I was still not sure what to say to Clarke and the more I tried to put some sort of speech together, the more unsure I become about coming to see her.

That’s when I heard steps approaching behind me and I turned around to find Clarke there.

“Lexa?” she said eyes going wide in surprise. “What are you doing here?” she added stepping closer to me.

We were face to face now, close enough for me to reach out and take her had if I wanted to, not that I would dare, but I wanted to. I must have hold her hand a thousand times in my dreams and now here I was in front of the real Clarke and quite frankly totally speechless and paralyzed. I’ve opened my mouth to say something, anything that could make me look less of a fool, but instead I said…

“I … just … I mean… these are for you…” and literally dropped the flowers into her arms.

“Thank you” she said and then immediately added “I take it you feel well?”

My eyes were still on her hands, holding the flowers now and I had to mentally kick myself out of the trance and dare to look at her. ‘Don’t look at her lips’ was the only thought in my brain. Not that looking into her eyes was easier. If I was at loss of words before, oh boy… you should have seen me now. And of course, my ‘don’t look at her lips’ mantra was useless, as my gaze dropped to her lips anyhow, maybe just for a second, but for sure long enough for her to notice. It was a disaster. Maybe the only way I could make things worse was to just blurt out that I loved her or something like that.

‘For fucks sake Woods, think! You are not a stupid teen anymore, just get it together! Snap out of it!’ … but instead I just kept staring at her. And she was staring right back at me. For a moment I thought I’ve seen something looking very much like defiance in her eyes, sort of a ‘I know you will not dare say a thing, you’ll just walk away’ kind of look and that changed everything. If for nothing else, but my pride, and I will find the words to tell her what brought me there.

But it was not words that popped into my head, instead I think I just went mad and my brain just lost it, as I saw myself, like in a slow-motion film, raise my hand to rest it on her shoulder, pulling her closer and just like that my lips were on hers…reason, be damned! 

(Clarke’s POV)

Ok… so she brought me flowers … and what?... she just dumps them into my arms like that? It’s almost rude, why did she even bring them? But I was raised to be polite, so I say thank you.

She finally looks at me, and there it is, green forest I could get lost in. A bit of a stormy green forest it seems, whatever battle is happening now in her head is clear as day reflected in her eyes.

Her eyes dropped a bit, staring at my lips, just for a moment, but it was enough for me to feel a shiver down my spine. Wild thoughts made their way into my brain, images from my dreams where she was doing more then just staring at my lips. Damn it, I want her to kiss me!

(Lexa’s POV)

The kiss lasted for what it seemed an eternity but was merely a second and Clarke was frozen in place. She did not push me back thought. I was about to step back and most probably run away, now that I literally made a fool of myself and potentially even assaulted her, when Clarke’s arm came to sit on the back of my neck gently pressing me forward deepening the kiss. Omg… she’s kissing me back!

I did not want it to end, the feeling of her, lightly biting at my lower lip, set my whole body on fire and almost caused my knees to give in. This was so much better than in my dreams. Eventually we broke apart and now she is not looking at me, her eyes fixing the flowers that now were laying on the floor.

We needed to talk…

“Clarke…”

She picks up the flowers and then finally looks at me again. The look on her face startles me, it’s like she is looking at somebody she knows for a long time, dare I say, with affection. I actually know that look, she looked at me like that before, in my dreams. It gives me the courage to start talking.

“I need to tell you something, for days now, I have these…” I start saying and the look in her eyes changes into something else, like she suddenly realized something.

“…dreams” she says, finishing my sentence.

“…dreams…indeed… how did you know?” I ask surprised.

“Because I have them too” Clarke said.. “They started the night after we met, I’ve had them every night since” she confessed.

“Me too, it’s like I lived a hundred lives and they were all with you”

She took my hand.

”What about this life?” she asked

“If you’ll have me, this life too”

And just like that Clarke kissed me again and said

“I do!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are. The end! I hope you enjoyed it.  
> I might add an epilogue in the next few days.


End file.
